A Bedford mother and her two daughters took a walk along Bedford embankment this month in memory of their Dad and Grandad, raising over £500 for the local hospice that cared for him.
Michelle Cain, 51, from the Putnoe area of Bedford organised her very own ‘Walk to Remember’ in support of Sue Ryder St John’s Hospice, walking alongside daughters Stacie, 26, and Jess, 23, in the gentle autumn sunshine on October 10.
“My daughters are super fit – they could have run it to be honest,” shares Michelle. “My knees were starting to hurt at the end, but walking together in the sunshine was really enjoyable.
“I wanted to do something because of what Sue Ryder did for us as a family. After Dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer Mum cared for him for four years, but when Dad’s health rapidly went downhill we needed support to keep him at home where he wanted to be. We reached out to Sue Ryder and they were there.
“My Grandmother was cared for at Sue Ryder St John’s Hospice some years ago and Mum always said how wonderful they were, so after Dad was diagnosed she rang Sue Ryder to see how they could support us. They told us when the time came and we needed them they would be there for us, and they were.”
Michelle’s Dad, David Allen, died in February 2021, and received care at home from Sue Ryder St John’s Palliative Care Hub.
“Even though we had dealt with most of Dad’s illness as a family, towards the end things were out of our control and he went downhill rapidly. We were stuck and we didn’t know what to do. That is when we rang Sue Ryder.
“The team at the Sue Ryder St John’s Palliative Care Hub literally got everything in place. They got a hospital bed delivered in two to three days and we had carers in straight away and we had regular phone calls to see how we were doing too.
“When things were at their worst Sue Ryder was there and they did everything they could. I don’t know what we would have done without their support – me or Mum. Dad wanted to die at home and we knew we were getting to that stage. Dad was so poorly and he couldn’t move but he was adamant he was not going to hospital. His wishes were to stay at home and Sue Ryder helped us achieve that.
“Sue Ryder care teams came every day, and sometimes at night too. Mum and I were staying in the front room with Dad and Sue Ryder arranged a night sit one night so we could have a night of sleep in bed. We had not heard of this service before, so we were gobsmacked. A full night’s sleep meant we could start again the next day and it made a massive difference to us.
“Every single member of staff who came in was amazing. It was like we had known them forever and they looked after Dad like they were looking after their own Dad. You don’t expect other people to care for your loved ones like you do. I don’t know how they do it.”
Michelle’s Dad, David Allen, who was known as Dave, worked as an engineer at Allens Engineering in Bedford, then Rolls Royce before retiring. He was married to Michelle’s Mum, Brenda, for 56 years.
“He was just the most amazing husband, Dad and Papa and the life and soul at parties. He was always laughing and always knew the right thing to say. So much has changed since we lost him and we feel as time goes on every day is getting harder without him.
“Mum has really been struggling, but when Sue Ryder were with us caring for Dad they said they would always be there for us if we needed them. Mum plucked up the courage to get in touch with them again and Sue Ryder has been amazing once again. Mum is now being supported by their family support team. Even now Sue Ryder continues to help us and we are so grateful.”
As well as raising over £500 from their own ‘Walk to Remember’ Michelle’s family set up an online donation page in Dave’s memory, which has raised over £1,000 for Sue Ryder too.
“Dad only died in February, and we set up a donation page in March which was so well supported. I didn’t think people would donate to us again. I am so pleased with how much we have raised with our walk, and I want to thank everyone so much for supporting us.
“No one knows how much you need support like this until it happens, and Sue Ryder continues to be there for us when we need it. I would love someone else to have the care that my Dad did.”
To donate to Michelle, Stacie and Jess’s fundraising visit their Just Giving page.
